1. |
Retching In The Wings
03:26
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Siren, message bearer
When they call her name the crowd turns sour
They’re counting on her failure
But she stands and says her piece in all her power
With her words still heavy in the air
I see her chin lift and a cold, hard stare
The curtain closes and leaves her there
Retching in the wings
Doubled over crying
Hollowed out adrenaline
Leaves her body shook
But that’s the cost of living
When you are a woman
Who has something
That she must say
Me too, I’ve got bad news
But they told me anger’s only for the righteous
They say, ‘Ladies should be subdued’
But I don’t know how much longer I can fight this
Truth becomes the bow that draws me in
Turns my tongue into the arrow flint
I let it fly but the kickback wins
Retching in the wings
Doubled over crying
Hollowed out adrenaline
Leaves my body shook
But that’s the cost of living
When you are a woman
Who has something
That she must say
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2. |
Calm Fury
03:21
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He is young and brave
Makes me feel my age
Equally able to charm the whole room and exasperate
I’m in the middle of
A word, he interrupts
To tell me what a hero the man in my story was
Then cowers when I counter: I am not a subplot
This calm fury
This is controlled burning
Don’t take everything so personally
Stay in the blackline
In the firebreak
He’s long in the tooth
Makes me feel my youth
Who am I to stand up here and speak to power about truth?
Could hear a pin drop
I’ve thrown the whole room off
Some woman cutting down the patriarchy, is it tough
To put up with this malarky when you’re one of the good ones
This calm fury
This is controlled burning
Don’t take everything so personally
Stay in the blackline
In the firebreak
I’m not after war
But we need to do
a little forest maintenance
Have some faith
That’s all I’m asking for
This is just calm fury
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3. |
Love & Retreat
04:06
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We talk religion, politics, all of the things
That families ought to resist
After dinner’s finished
It’s never been like this before
We’ve loved, we’ve laughed, we’ve never been at war
I keep eyeing the door
I meet her eyes across the room, try to guess what she thinks
Of this conversational catastrophe
When she walks away and just starts to clean
I think, it’s a fine line between love and retreat
The TV’s off, we all sit and talk, the night begins
To turn into the dawn
And the wine is all gone
No music in the background now
He stands up, cuts me off, and begins to shout
He is on his toes now
I bring myself right to the edge of my seat
And my fingers grip the books in my lap that he lent me
I start to fidget with the page corners and think
That it’s a fine line between love and retreat
We sit across the table at a restaurant
To give it one more shot
Guess that’s all that we’ve got
His parting words are sharp, for sure,
But it’s not anything that I haven’t heard
I know he’s just bitter
After I pay the bill, I take a ride to the beach
And I dig a hole in the sand with my nephew and niece
I try to act like everything is still in one piece
But it’s a fine line between love and retreat
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4. |
Swim
03:05
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I focus on my breath, on my breath
I push away from the edge
Every exhale measures time
Bittersweet symphony keeps playing
Ironic quartet of strings
So I swim to match the pace
Feel my heart begin to race
Feel fires rage
Lungs burn, hands shake
Touch, turn
Work it out inside the lane
I focus on the place that I am in
Water covering my skin
And it all begins to fade
Carried off with each new wave
Feel fires rage
Ice form, glass break
Lungs burn, hands shake
Touch, turn, rethink
Touch, turn
Work it out inside the lane
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5. |
May I Rage, May I Love
03:57
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I am gonna stand my ground here
I won’t hide from all of the things that I fear
I won’t rely on safe-space-taking
Comfort is anti-ground-breaking
Could I come to the end of my days
Never step foot into the march against hate?
Can I own my own mistake-making?
Own my perfection as faking?
May I rage for the righting of wrongs
May I love even where I see wrong
May I rage most against my own flaws
May I love, may I love, may I love
May I rage, may I love
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6. |
Radio Silence
03:27
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Radio silence, the more time passes, the louder the quiet
I sent a satellite message into the past tense
In search of some vestige of you
You just might be a figment dream
I have when I’m sleeping
Some false memory I subconsciously
Started to believe in
Cuz I don’t know where you are
Or where you’re coming from anymore
I thought we were somewhere
Somewhere together
But now I’m just waiting for any answer
Alone in another time zone
I notice your words, the way they turn
My questions to learning
More of what I might think, draw me out like string
Til I’m frayed at the seams, exposed
And I don’t know where you are
Or where you’re coming from anymore
I thought we were somewhere
Somewhere together
But now I’m just waiting for any answer
For more than an echo stuck in a feedback
Loop, I’ve been waiting
Such a long time for you
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7. |
Move On
03:02
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Goodbye is the beginning
Of somebody else’s song
I say it and a scene unfolds
They’re away
The sound of his laugh is winning
I can hear it with my eyes closed
The sunshine in her smile glows
They’re away, away, away, away…
I never know the right time to
Move on, move on
How does anyone know when they ought to
Move on, move on
Why can’t I just be glad that you got to
Move on, move on
I never know the right time to
Move on, move on
The news come in like a headline:
“Newlyweds start again”
All they touch falls into order
As well it should
But good news can be a plumb line
Look at how far off-course I’ve tread
Why do I need somebody else to tell me
That I could, I could, I could
Move on, move on
How does anyone know when they ought to
Move on, move on
Why can’t I just be glad that you got to
Move on, move on
I never know the right time to
Move on Move on
Move On
Move On (They’re off to the sunny side of the continent)
Move On (Golden coast for a golden love)
Move On (while I’m here stuck in concrete)
Move On (my life is concrete, oh my)
I never know the right
I never know the right
I never know the right time to
Move On
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8. |
Bad Cycle
04:39
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Shoulders ache with feelings I cannot contain
Maybe even my jaw will break
From bearing down on this
Close my eyes and try to keep this heat inside
Don’t want anyone to see this vice
But my eyes always give me away
Oh my god!
I thought I was alright
Made my peace with ignoring this fight
But now I see a fire spreading wild
How can I contain what I deny?
Beauty hides beneath a mask of little lies
I tell myself to disguise
The way I really feel
But somewhere deep inside I hear a bell begin to peal
It signals what I felt was real
Anger doesn’t just go away
Oh my god!
I thought I was alright
Made my peace with ignoring this fight
But now I feel some fire spreading wild
And I can’t contain what I deny
Bad cycle
Bad cycle
Bad cycle
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9. |
Darling, I Suffer
04:31
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I know it’s hard to hear
About wildfires when you’re in a drought
But I’ve suffered for a long time
And it was more than you knew I had felt
So now what I really need
Is for you to help me
Ok, this might be a bit much—
But I’m asking you to listen
I’ve hidden my heart for too long
And I need to open up again
I need to let you find me
Let you come and find me
Where I am
In a storm of angry feeling
That cuts through me like current through the sky
Where a flash of light glows red upon the eye
Where my heart quakes with hurt I tried to hide
Where eventually
Sound catches up to the light
I don’t want vengeance
I don’t wanna hold onto bitter doubts
So I practice patience
And I try to let go of the fears I have felt
That all my love and honesty
Won’t be enough to make you see
See me
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10. |
Daylight Savings
04:06
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Daylight savings and I’ve been up late
Got my second wind, lost track of the date
Every year I feel like I’m losing a friend
Can’t wait til the day we fall back again
Don’t save me any daylight
It doesn’t really make me feel better
I’m not really a go-getter
I don’t wanna lose the moonlight
And work in sunny weather
Never knowing when to quit
So don’t save me any daylight
Sixty minutes out of a life
Is it the turning point or the edge of a knife?
Is it just like any other hour before?
Time fades so fast and I want more.
Don’t save me any daylight
It doesn’t really make me feel better
I’m not really a go-getter
I don’t wanna lose the moonlight
And work in sunny weather
Never knowing when to quit
So don’t save me any daylight
Sunrise, am I
Missing out on my own life?
Did I work hard or rest well?
I’ve forgotten how to tell
With numbered days to try and get it right
Don’t wanna waste a second chasing after light
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11. |
As Long As You're There
05:16
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I think the light will work here
At least it’s better than the last place
Popcorn ceiling and no screens
But we can buy some, and we can paint
What else can we do?
We can’t keep crashing on that couch
Over on Avenue.
Home is wherever I go, wherever I lay my head
As long as you’re there, I can be anywhere in the world
As long as you’re there
We moved here last October
The bullet hole was here when we came
No, we don’t really mind the neighbours
I practice all the time and they never complain
Sometimes their snoring keeps me up
The walls are thin, no insulation, winters are cold as—
But home is wherever we go, wherever I lay my head
As long as he’s there, I can be anywhere in the world
As long as he’s there
Quick, shut of the lights and come see
Looks like another police raid
How many cops this time? I count fifteen.
Is that a record? I think it might be.
Do you think things have gone south?
Is it getting worse, or are we just getting worn out?
Home is wherever we go, wherever I lay my head
As long as you’re there, I can be anywhere in the world
As long as you’re there.
The day we came home with Sadie
They said we had to pack up our stuff
The shelter was full, but they saw the baby
So they took her, that’s when things got real tough
We’re still trying to make it work.
We got a tent and found a spot
Underneath the Gardiner
Home is wherever she is, wherever she lays her head
And as long as there’s air, we would be anywhere in the world,
As long as she’s there
And we’re together there.
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